So we’ve all gotten this email before. As soon as I see this subject line, the first thing I do is delete it. The more it begs me not to, the faster I click the “X”. I always hate these emails because inevitably, if I were to try to read it, I know I’ll have the equivalent of tennis elbow in my right index finger from all the scrolling I’ll have to do to get past the million or so email addresses and “Forwarded By’s” before finally arriving at the anti-climatic “— Original Message —.”

Once I finally do make it to the Original Message (OM), it attempts to guilt me into doing a lot of work or else little Timmy won’t get his operation or, worse than that, I’ll have bad luck for years. The OM might go so far as to call me names, like “Lame” or accuse me of being a spoilsport:

This is for kicks…do not be LAAAME and spoil the good times. Copy (do not forward) this entire e-mail and paste it into a new email. Don’t forget to delete out all the other email addresses so this doesn’t get impossibly long. Change all of the answers so that they apply to you. Then, send this to a whole bunch of people you know *INCLUDING* the person who sent it to you. It is fun and easy breezy.

Now, buddy, I ain’t buyin what you’re selling because replying, copying, pasting, cutting, deleting, changing responses, and typing in the email addresses of everyone I know doesn’t sound easy or breezy or fun. Already, I’ve wasted 5 minutes of my life reading the dang email!

However, it’s like they say “hate the game, not the player.” Some of my friends really enjoy sending and receiving these emails. And that’s okay. I certainly don’t hate my friends for this guilty pleasure, I just hate the game. Usually, I respectfully decline to play, but today I got that one that’s all “Learn about your friends by answering these interesting questions.” I have to admit I do find the responses of my friends interesting. And I do feel guilty sometimes for not responding in kind. So . . . I decided that the most I could do was respond to it here, so that at least it isn’t clogging up anyone’s email, especially if they don’t know me. I figure, anyone who would be interested in my response is checking this blog anyway. Plus, my sweet girlfriend that sent it plugged my blog as her favorite website. Such a gesture cannot go unnoted!

Now, part of the “rules” of the response was to add your own question to the bottom before sending it on to the next person and I have done so (#69), thereby, making this an applicable blog post for a southerner in Ireland.

1. First Name: Joy
2. Were you named after anyone? No
3. Do you wish on stars? No
4. When did you last cry? like wail? About 2 weeks ago
5. Do you like your handwriting? Not really
6. What is your favorite lunch meat? Salami
7. What is your birthdate? January 19, 1976
8. What is your most embarrassing CD? “Honey” Soundtrack
9. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you? TSYBB (That’s Something You’d Better Believe)
10. Are you a daredevil? No, even less so the older I get
11. Have you ever told a secret you swore not to tell? Yes, but not yours
12. Do looks matter? I agree with my girlfriend’s answer: Only as far as they accentuate a personality
13. How do you release anger? In stages. Stage 1 is cussing.
14. Where is your second home? Georgia
15. Do you trust others easily? Yes
16. What was your favorite toy as a child? I didn’t have a favorite, maybe Rainbow Bright or Speak’N Spell
17. What class in high school do you think was totally useless? Health
18. Do you have a journal? Yes, my last entry was probably over a year ago. I usually only write in when I’m really angry so anyone who reads it later will think I was a really mean person.
19. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Do chicken’s lay eggs?
20. What are your nicknames? Joy-Joy (rarely), but a lot of people call me Joyce or Jill at first.
21. Would you bungee jump? No way, no how.
22. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? Nope.
23. Do you think that you are strong? Totally Buff-y
24. What’s your favorite ice cream flavor? Vanilla
25. Shoe Size? 10
27. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? Sometimes I don’t know when I’ve taken a joke too far.
28. Who do you miss most? TheManOnTheCorner
29. Do you want everyone you send this to send it back? Heck no.
30. What color pants and shoes are you wearing? I’m not wearing shoes – oh la la. Blue jeans though.
31. What are you listening to right now? The Simpsons
32. Last thing you ate? Chips (aka Fries)
33. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Peach (it works on so many levels)
34. What is the weather like right now? Grey, dreary, drizzly, windy, cold (come visit Ireland!)
35. Last person you talked to on the phone? Rinell
36. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? Nothing really until he makes me laugh. Then, probably his smile.
37. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Love that girl!
38. Favorite Drink? Snapple Peach Iced Tea. Alcoholic? Bloody Mary, extra spice, extra olives.
39. Favorite Sport? To play: Soccer, To watch: DodgeBall
44. Hair Color? Dark brown
45. Eye Color? I maintain that they are Hazel (blue-green), not brown-green and not blue – not that I’m against those eye colors.
46. Do you wear contacts? No
47. Favorite Food? Too broad a question.
48. Last Movie You Watched? Kingdom of Heaven (don’t bother)
49. Favorite Day Of The Year? October 31
50. Scary Movies Or Happy Endings? Either or both.
51. Summer Or Winter? Summer – Georgia summers not Seattle summers.
52. Hugs OR Kisses? Either or both.
53. What Is Your Favorite Dessert? Too broad a question, but chocolate is involved.
54. Who Is Most Likely To Respond? Not me.
55. Who Is Least Likely To Respond? Me.
56. Living Arrangements? Chad and I in an apartment in Ireland for 4.5 months, otherwise, our cats, Harry and Cinder, have two pets – me and Chad – in our little house in Seattle.
57. What Books Are You Reading? “The Quiet American” and “Ulysses”.
58. What is on your mousepad? Me making a monster face at Shay at my wedding after-party.
59. What Did You Watch Last night? The Simpsons, Friends, Property Ladder, Sex and the City, Ally McBeal
60. Favorite website? My blog, of course!
61. Do you support any charities? Yes, United Way, local firefighter and police associations, and breast cancer.
62. Are you married? Yes
63. Favorite Smells? The air right before a thunderstorm, goodies baking.
64. Rolling Stones or Beatles? Either or both.
65. Doing housework or reading? Housework!
66. Where’s the furthest you’ve been? The Cliffs of Dover
67. First music concert: Live
68. Concert you would have to paid large sums of money to sit through: Maybe an Elvis concert.
69. Current country of residence? The Republic of Ireland

An hour later, I’m finally ready to post this. Fun and easy breezy.

2 Responses to “Sub: DO NOT DELETE THIS EMAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!”

  1. jackt Says:

    Do they check your baggage for a couple of works by Joyce before you can leave? I have given up on Ulysses two times, although I did make it through the movie.

    Recently picked up Portrait of the Artist figuring to prime myself for the out of brain experience one more time. My snapshot review: I found it less than Ulysses. But now comes the good news! I can just wait for the book report here.

    #70 What about you would you most like to change? Email address.

  2. JoyLuck Says:

    Yes, I’ve given up on Ulysses once already myself, so I went back, read Dubliners and Portrait of and Artist, now I’m going to try Ulysses again. Chad’s plugging through it as well. We’ll see if we make it through.

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